A Beautiful Day with Karen Gillan

A beautiful spring day. The sun is shining, nary a cloud in the air, the grass is green and smells sweeter than sweet. Not quite as sweet however as the sight of Karen Gillan sitting across from you licking whipped cream from her lips. What could possibly better? Well, you can certainly think of a few possibilities, none of which are suitable for polite company. “I think I lost this one.” you say as you cross your legs. “I think you might be right” she replies, giggling in that way she has. Why is everything about her so cute? Her hair, her skin, her clothes, her brogue… All of them just make you want to scoop her up in your arms and… No, let’s not go there. The whipped cream from earlier was bad enough, but those thoughts have a way of congregating. “It doesn’t hurt when you cross your legs like that?” “N…no…” “You’re squeezin’ ’em so tight though!”…

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Fuck Buddy with Stacy Keibler

“Who the hell is that?” I remarked, as I stood in the corner of the party with two of my friends. We were attending a colleagues birthday party in New York City when I happened to glance across the way and spied the stunning statuesque blonde. Truth be told we had only agreed to go to the private function after learning that there would be free alcohol there. I know it wasn’t exactly the most noble of reasons to go but as it turned out it was one of the best decisions I ever made. Elegantly wasted, I stood admiring the leggy blonde for some time before I finally found the nerve to approach her, and was promptly introduced through mutual friends and soon discovered that her name was Stacy Keibler. As it turned out, Stacy was apparently some kind of celebrity wrestler which initially surprised me considering how feminine and sweet she appeared to be. Nevertheless my apparent lack…

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Ariana Grande – Love Me Harder

It was a classic case of teenage stupidity—a situation in which Ariana and her friends had gone out shopping for the day and thought it would be amusing to see if they could get away with stealing some clothes. Naturally the pint-sized teenager was stopped by the department store detective and the police were soon called. But fortunately for them the officer in charge recognized who they were and took pity on them, gave them a stern warning before driving them home. As luck would have it I had been staying at the house for a few days and it was sheer chance that Ariana’s folks were still at work when she arrived home in the squad car. “What’s going on?” I said at the door. “Are you a parent or guardian?” the female officer asked. “Yes. She’s my niece.” I answered. “Her folks will be home in a few hours.” The policewoman went on to explain what had occurred…

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Kate Upton – Hot Tales

Everything had been a blur since that first show I had worked on. Let alone the evening that had followed after with Kate and Vanessa. It looked like my luck was in. I was picked up for a few more shows working in different cities across the world and starting to make a name for myself, building up some connections which was all to the good. It had led me to New York fashion week itself. Different shows going on all week as the different lines and collections were all displayed. It also led me to some new work and of course into contact with a whole host of models and other celebrities who were attending. That week the main star who was currently standing out that I had the luck to meet was Kate Upton. She wasn’t working, but knowing several of the models and designers she had been around backstage a few times and had flashed a few…

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Hot Night with Lauren Cohan

It was the middle of the night as I landed in San Diego and stood waiting in the lobby for my famous step-sister to pick me up. As it turned out, Lauren had apparently hit it big on a hit TV show called “The Walking Dead” but was now having “issues” with several overzealous fans. It seemed a few of the guys were getting aggressive with her on social media and making all kinds of menacing statements, enough to make her paranoid, and almost consider cancelling her Comic Con appearance. This of course was all news to me as I’d been living in Australia for the past few years and had barely stayed in touch with anybody back in the UK. In fact the mere idea that Lauren had “fans” made me chuckle considering how awkward she was growing up. In truth, the part time kick-boxer was more than capable of taking care of herself, but it was our folks…

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Solo With Jennie Kim

The trouble with being in a successful k-pop band like BLΛƆKPIИK, is the demands it has on its members as it’s a very challenging job leaving little time to unwind, or much less indulge in a relationship. Frankly speaking the girls in the group were just too busy to have private lives, and spent seven days a week perfecting their craft, spending all of their time in the recording studio and working on dance choreography. Everything they did was solely focused on making BLΛƆKPIИK a worldwide sensation. That being said, I had been tasked with accompanying the girls on their first world tour, and in a short amount of time had become pretty intimate with them. In fact it was while spending some time in Australia that Jennie had booked her first consultation with me while the others were out sightseeing and doing press. Up until that point things between us had been pleasant and professional, even if she vowed…

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Secretarial Duties – Vanessa Merrell

Over the last twenty years or so, I’ve been fortunate enough to be financially well off, maybe not a millionaire, but enough to own a successful company, and occasionally travel the world. As for me, to describe myself, I’m a Caucasian male in my mid forties, whose a rather good looking fella, and in pretty great shape for my age. I recently had to let my previous secretary go, due to some illegal activity she was involved in, and replaced her with a young woman named Vanessa Merrell. Admittedly she wasn’t the sharpest tool in the shed as they say, but I’d be lying if I said she wasn’t one of the most beautiful women I’d ever seen, which is why I hired her three months ago. It was during that time, that I had developed a sexual relationship with the twenty-one year old woman, despite the fact that I was a little more than twice her age. I have…

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How I Fucked A Celebrity (who happened to be Salma Hayek)

Hola! My name is Hymie. In English you’d probably call me Jim or Jimi. I live in Coatzacoalcos, Mexico. I’m twenty-one. I didn’t go to College, I’m “street smart” but I didn’t have the smarts it took to do good in High School and get into College. But who cares? Hardly anyone I know has gone to College but we have what we need and are content, si? I work and give most of my money to my family. I don’t have much of my own – my parents don’t even have a television or anything really fancy – but I make enough money to have been able to buy my own cell phone and pay the bill. I don’t text much, my writing is not very good. But I do call my friends but mostly I’m already hanging out with them. I mostly use my phone for what you call the world wide web. I like to – how…

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Private Lessons With Kira Kosarin

Growing up in Hawaii, surfing wasn’t just a lifestyle but a religion. In fact I spent half the week surfing, and the other half giving lessons to local tourists, bored housewives, and ambitious entertainment types who thought surfing should be part of their L.A lifestyle. The first time I met Kira Kosarin she was just 20-years-old, and vacationing on the island with her family and friends. As it turned out the young actress wanted to learn to surf, and I was more than ready to take the $60 (an hour) fee. Sadly, Kira was no means a natural, and so uncoordinated on the water is was amusing. Not that it really mattered of course, since she was paying by the hour and was intend of spending the entire day with me. Over the next few hours our lessons merely consisted of nothing more than some hold-and-push. You know, where she’d lay on the board and I’d give her a nudge…

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Nicole Kidman’s Encounter

Nicole Kidman is featured on a show about ghostly encounters with famous people and shares her horrifying experience. [Commercial break ends] [Announcer:] We now return to our show. [Fade in. A spooky graveyard is shown, accompanied by equally chilling music.] [Voice-over:] Welcome back to Otherworldly Encounters Of The Rich And Famous. I’m your host, Lon Chaney, IV. If you’re just tuning in, Gary Coleman and Jim Nabors shared their encounters with the unknown in pre-recorded interviews. But Gary Coleman and Jim Nabors are not only famous figures to have brushes with the dark side… Live from our studio today, we have well-known and critically-acclaimed actress Nicole Kidman. Once, even she endured a harrowing experience with a being – or beings… from the other side. In an Otherworldly Encounters Exclusive, Ms. Kidman is going to relate her encounter with us. [Fade in to actress Nicole Kidman sitting in a simple room, dimly lit. Nicole’s long, wavy red hair trails around her…

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