Spice Girls xxx

Late last year the Girls did their tour of Australia and set the whole bloody country on its head – screaming teenage girls trashing the joint. I won one of those radio competitions to meet the band, and upon turning up at the designated place their manager was quite surprised to see a guy who had just hit 30 instead of one of the pimply faced teenagers that always seem to win (his words, not mine). The manager and I headed next door and got a beer while we waited for the girls who were just completing a photo shoot for WHO magazine. After a couple of beers (I did introduce him to a few classic Aussie brews) his pager went off, with a message telling us that the girls were ready to meet the contestant winner (I bet they just couldn’t wait to meet another pimply faced teenager). Anyway we headed up to the suite they were using for…

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Melrose Place xxx parody

It was late morning when Sydney returned to the apartment building. Thankfully, no one there was keeping regular tabs on her so her absence over the night would be missed. After formulating their plan, Sydney and Kimberly had made love twice more. Leaving, Sydney had stopped at a gift store to pick up the two items she needed. A surge of excitement moved through her, rivaling the night before. She was going to enjoy this so much. She walked to Jane’s apartment and lightly rapped on the door. Jane opened it. Her short blond hair shook along with her head when she saw Sydney. She was wearing a loose t-shirt and a pair of black slacks. “Syd, I’m due at the studio in a couple of hours. I don’t have time to deal with you. Go away.” “Jeez, all I wanted was to show you something,” Sydney said, giving a quick glance in either direction to make sure no one…

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Cuban Holiday with Emma Watson 1.

Ah, Cuba… Sun, sand, island time… It was just what I needed. I was enjoying being pretty much anonymous at the resort, even with the relationships I had built during previous stays. My little bit of Spanish had served me very well, and the resort folks recognized that I was just there to relax, and not be waited on hand and foot like so many of the other guests. The benefits were many, from food and drink to local tours and inclusion in some of the after hours activities with the staff, my own little familia cubana. A little respect goes a long way. So I wasn’t really expecting anything when I made my way back to my room after breakfast the second day and saw the back of a very shapely brunette who looked like she was trying to get into my room, and being quite vocally displeased about not being able to… “God DAMN it! It figures, I…

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Fan fucks Selena Gomez

Selena Gomez is at a fan signing at a local Starbucks. This is to promote her new album she is going to sell soon. It is a hot day and Selena Gomez is getting tired and annoyed. She wants to go home and relax. After she autograph one of her old albums the next person came up, a fair looking man who looks to be in his twenties. He is wearing a shirt with one of her model pics. The one with her wearing a bikini on a blue matress with two big hoop earrings. “I’m a big fan” He tugged on his shirt to show her. “I can see that.” She nodded. She was annoyed and slightly creeped out. Usually her fans are children and pre-teens but she noticed that the line are all adult men. Their probably more fan of her body than her music. “I loved you since…” He trailed off momentarily as he got an eyeful…

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My affair with Megyn Kelly 2.

I felt the bright light of morning hit me on the face as I laid in bed. I turned away from the light and saw Megyn Kelly lying next to me, naked and glowing. I smiled as I remembered it wasn’t a dream, and decided for a few seconds longer enjoy the image. Because I know as soon as she wakes up, she will claim this was a horrible mistake and storm out, or say it was a mistake but thank me for being a gentlemen up to the love making session of the night. Yet I decided to make the best of it, so I got out of bed, closed the shades, dressed and grabbing my room key and wallet left to get some coffee. Downstairs in the lobby, I noticed a coffee bar near the restaurant/bar, so making my way over there, I ordered a couple of coffees. Not knowing what she drinks, I ordered her a vanilla…

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My affair with Megyn Kelly 1.

I never thought I would get involved with another married woman, especially with Megyn Kelly of Fox News, but things happened. It started the weekend of my wife’s and I wedding anniversary, and we had planned to celebrate by spending three nights in New York City in Manhattan during New Years; We celebrate two anniversaries, one in December and one in October, because we were married in a civil ceremony before I shipped out to Iraq so our parents could focus on the time I was gone on the big family wedding. Yet two days before our trip, the wife was told by her boss she had to cover one of her coworkers who ended up in the hospital. After talking about it, we decided since the plane tickets and hotel were nonrefundable and we didn’t know when we could afford it again, that I would go. It worked out since my in-laws and parents had taken our children to…

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Baywatch Marathon Saturday

COZI TV had a Baywatch Marathon Saturday and Sunday, and Saturday evening I watched a favorite two-parter from 1992 “The Trophy”, guest starring A.J. Langer. A.J. Langer is one of those actresses who looked a lot younger than her age, so she could play younger characters. I believe on Baywatch was the first time I saw her. She played the “new girl on the beach”, and lyingly told everyone she seduced lifeguard Eddie Kramer to become popular. Then I saw her in the 1991 horror film The People Under The Stairs. She looked so young in that movie. I’ve been watching In The Heat Of The Night every Sunday night on THiS, and she played a recurring character called Meagan Fowler, who loved to get fucked, especially by older men, even if they were married. I like to think sometimes “art imitates life”, and A.J. was a wild girl. Lately my “Making Babies” entries have been good girls or somewhat…

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Beyonce / Sasha Fierce vs Solange Knowles

Beyonce Knowles woke up alone in her king-sized bed. Jay-Z is out of town for a couple of days to promote his new club opening in another state, so Bey has the entire house to herself. She got up to take a shower, but before she could reach the bathroom the phone rang. “Hello, Beyonce speaking?” she answered. “Hey Bey, it’s Solo.” Solange said. “What’s going on?” Beyonce asked. “Well, seeing how Shawn is out of town I figured you’d be kinda lonely. So I thought this would be the best time for us to bond again.” Solange explained. “Awww, that’s so sweet, sure Solo, you can comeover” Bey says. “Great! I’ll be there shortly so you can have time to clean up because I’m sure you just woke up and all.” Solange said. “Okay! So about an hour you think?” Beyonce asked. “Yeah. That’ll give me time to get some clothes done. See you soon.” Solange said. “Okay. Bye.”…

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What if Tilda Swinton and Mia Wasikowska were artists in Soho?

Mia, an expatriate artist from Australia, was moving into a loft apartment in Soho, West London. As she unpacked, one of her neighbors, an older redheaded woman, entered. “Hello, there,” the woman said, alerting Mia to her presence. “Oh, hi.” “You must be Mia.” “Yeah, Mia Wasikowska. It’s Polish.” “You’re an Aussie.” “Yeah, you can tell, can’t you?” “I’m Matilda, or Tilda, or Miss Swinton, if you prefer.” “Well, hi.” Mia offered her hand, and Tilda took it and kissed it. “Um, yeah, thanks.” Mia laughed nervously. Tilda noticed some painting implements that Mia had unpacked. “So, you’re a painter?” “Yeah, I am.” “What kind of things do you paint?” “Oh, you know, whatever.” “Well, if you ever need a model, I’m right down the hall, in 206.” “Right, I’ll, uh, keep that in mind.” A few days later, Mia was looking out the window, trying to find something to paint, but nothing appealed to her. She then remembered Tilda’s…

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Boobs and Boners

“Morning slugger.” Linda said as she passed her son in the hallway. She looked like a 39 year old Katy Perry, but with a shapelier figure and enormous breasts. Linda had just come from the bathroom…a tiny white towel draped around her voluptuous body. Bobby’s eyes followed the sway of her meaty buttocks…barley covered as she pranced into her bedroom. Drawn like a magnet he moved to her doorway…just in time to see the towel fall to the floor. Spotting her son in the doorway Linda put her hands on her hips…her big bobbling pear-shaped breasts ballooning outward. She fed him a look that was stern but not angry. “Bobby!” She whispered in a cute little mommy-tone, glancing towards the master bath where her husband could be heard preparing for work. Giving her son a silent scold, yet with a hint of a smile Linda closed the bedroom door. Oh the poor baby…he must be crazy horny…sneaking up on me…

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