Kaley Cuoco’s Snapshots

I was wandering around my girlfriend’s home, trying out my new phone and its recording capabilities. By the time I got to the bathroom, I was vaguely aware of my girlfriend walking around in there, but it wasn’t enough to make me stop. The door was open, so I figured nothing extremely private was going on. Then I walked in on my girlfriend pulling up her underwear, just in time to catch her naked pussy on my camera phone. Her pink top and her black sweatpants hanging below her ankles kept any more nudity from being shown, but I still got part of it without trying for one second. And my girlfriend is Big Bang Theory star Kaley Cuoco. Perhaps I buried the lead there. In that case, I should explain just to be safe that by the time you have read this, she got married. And not to me. She didn’t break up because I accidentally filmed part of…

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Special Guest Star – Kat Dennings

“I missed this,” I thought I heard. With my face buried in Kat Denning’s bursting cleavage, I could be forgiven for not hearing her right. Nevertheless, I chose to believe I heard her right and said, “Me too,” although I probably made it hard for her to hear me. “Well, doy,” I heard a little better. At that point, I finally lifted my head out of her chest, and she used her lips to cover mine instead of talking some more. I relaxed onto the ratty fake TV couch of Kat’s ratty, fake TV apartment set, while Kat laid on top of me. She was still in her yellow, red striped TV waitress uniform from 2 Broke Girls, the show we both worked on – although she did much more than me. For this first day back on the set for Season Four, we were doing what we did after the first day of shooting in Seasons Two and Three….

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Erotic night with Anna Kendrick

The theater was completely empty as I made my way in. I wasn’t too surprised, given that this low budget, indie, ultra violent Ryan Gosling movie had been out for a few weeks. It would probably be out of theaters next weekend ‘ and it would have been cheaper to stay home and find a copy online. I wouldn’t be wishing I did that in a few hours. And it had nothing to do with the movie. Not directly, anyway. Before the trailers finally ended, I did notice someone else coming in. But it was only one person and he or she was sitting about five rows in front of me. I paid it no mind as I watched the film in my solitude. Halfway through, I did hear something. It wasn’t the movie, since Gosling hadn’t spoken in about 25 minutes. As the latest silent montage played out, I heard something out of place. Something that sounded like’.moaning. It…

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Swimming with Kate Upton

The first time I saw Kate Upton on my Costa Rican vacation was when I first checked in. I was signing a form at the front desk of the hotel – and I would have handed the pen back to the clerk if she didn’t show up. “Oh, sorry!” she spoke, once she realized she was technically cutting in front of me. “It’s okay, I can wait.” However, once I saw her in her white t-shirt and shorts – both of which were fairly low cut – I knew it’d be a while before I actually did something. At least until I dropped the pen on the ground. But that resulted in Kate bending down in front of me – in that low cut t-shirt – so no harm done. Then again, that might change if I didn’t move anytime soon. I recovered enough to finish signing my form, then stepped aside before I knew any better. By the time…

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Pre-Oscar Night with Amy Adams

An Academy Award nominated actress was fucking me in the back seat of my car. On the day before the Oscars. Or so she told me at my favorite café this afternoon. She said her name was Amy Adams, but it didn’t ring a distinctive bell. If I’d seen that red hair and those big blue eyes on a big screen, though, I probably would have recognized it, but I didn’t. She said she was nominated for a movie called ‘Junebug’ but that didn’t ring a bell either. She said that she was a big bundle of nerves the night before going to the Oscars for the first time. And she needed to unwind. Or at least give herself some hot memory to compose herself before millions of people. That part I did get. Especially when I drove her to an alley and she started kissing me. I had enough composure to get us into my backseat first, where ‘Amy’…

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Jennifer Lawrence’s Wild Weekend

This little getaway was the best idea I ever had. I knew that even before I saw Jennifer Lawrence in that one piece, cleavage baring red swimsuit before we went into my pool today. Always best to be sure, though. Though we hadn’t been together for too long, it was fortunate that we started out while her schedule was open for once. As such, it was far easier to set up this little weekend getaway at my house. A little late Friday afternoon swim in my pool seemed like the perfect way to start. Leaving aside all the erections I had to hide both in and out of the pool. Especially inside, when Jennifer jumped around in the water, swam near me in the water, and generally got wet in the water. As if it wasn’t easy enough to think of those hypnotic boobs popping out just a little more from that suit – since they were certainly wet enough…

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The Greatest Bath – Katheryn Winnick

I’m laying on my couch, watching some boring ass documentary on whales, just trying to fall asleep. Sleeping hasn’t been the easiest since I broke my foot in three places. What was the only good thing about my foot? Well, besides time off from being a fight choreographer for History’s “Vikings?” The best part was that my good friend, Katheryn Winnick, had made it her job to take care of me when she’s off set. The front door opens and I can hear the click-clack of my self-appointed nurse’s heels in the hallway. “Ben?” she asks lightly, probably trying to see if I’m awake or not. She doesn’t want to be too loud in case I am. “Hi, Katheryn,” I say with a dead voice. Katheryn comes into view and pouts, her hands on her shapely hips. She knows there’s nothing she can really do to boost my mood. I’m a very active guy. I leave on my feet, but…

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Christina Hendricks xxx fanfic

It took six months after meeting and being with Jenna Fischer to earn another temping job on “30 Rock.” As it turned out, it took two months longer than that for my experiences with Tina Fey to pay off for my next gig. But I didn’t blame Tina – especially considering what show asked for me. Instead of an award winning NBC cult comedy, an award winning cult drama wanted my services for a few weeks in mid-July 2009. I would take a trip back to the ‘60s and into the world of “Mad Men” – although technically they filmed in Los Angeles in the present day. But I would play a small part in making sure that it still looked and sounded like the ‘60s, as if Matthew Weiner and company weren’t exact enough. The temp agency didn’t tell me that I got a recommendation from celebrities this time. However, it did not escape me that Tina had gotten…

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Rose Byrne – The Tourist

I should have known it would end this way. Things here in Sydney, Australia were just too perfect. First I go out and close the major deal my company sent me out here for. Then one of my Australian counterparts offers me a spare pass for a movie premiere held here tonight. What’s more, it’s for a movie I already saw in the States a month ago – but I didn’t need to tell him that. So of course, my luck has to end with me walking on the road at just the wrong time. The right time for me to get knocked on my ass by a limo. It couldn’t have been going that fast, which is how I survived – and how only my hip and right side really hurts. If my head wasn’t in the clouds, I would have avoided this easily. But here we are. And here I was trying to roll myself off the road….

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Sexy Dreams with Lea Michele

Once again it took me six months for my next temp assignment. What’s more, for the second straight time I would be working for a show I had already temped at before – in this case “Glee.” But this time I was heading back under different circumstances. It was exactly because I had served on “Glee” two Aprils ago that I was being asked back now, since they needed temps they could trust to keep quiet. The show was filming its third season finale, where several of the key characters were about to graduate from high school. When news broke months ago that there would be graduations, rumors spread that key cast members would leave the show entirely as well. This set off a firestorm that FOX and creator Ryan Murphy didn’t want to repeat, so they were determined to keep things under wraps this time. I had to fill out more confidentiality forms than usual, to make sure I…

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