Want to hear a true story about how Hannah and I fucked Madonna?

“Yeah, RIGHT!” you’re saying, “In your dreams, pal.” And, I don’t blame you one iota for doubting such a preposterous claim. I sometimes find it hard to believe myself. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve rolled over in bed, waking from a half-dream, and gazed deep into my pretty Californian wife’s blue blue eyes and she’s just smirked back ’cause she’s known what I’m going to ask before I even ask it. I guess I must just have this bemused “Did I really just win 6 million pounds on the lottery?” expression plastered over my face. “What is it, honey?” she’ll ask, humouring me as she playfully twists strands of silky red hair around her finger. (Hannah’s always playing with her hair – not in a nervous way, you understand. It’s just this cute little habit she has.) “Have you forgotten how to speak, is that it? Has your tongue run off to London to see the…

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Jerked off in a Restaurant by Madonna

I dated Madonna. You know, Madonna the sex/porn rock singer Madonna. She had me trailing around after her for several weeks, before she dumped me for this really huge Chinese guy. This story is about one incident at a sidewalk cafe on Sunset Blvd. Right inside West Hollywood. We were waiting for some friends of hers, and they were late so we took a table nearest the street so we could watch for them. We were seated at the back of the area and this allowed her to open her blouse and let anyone who walked by see her bright pink nipples with the gold piercing rings. Madonna loved to flash waiters, especially the gay ones. She felt it was a real challenge to get their cocks hard. She also liked to expose my cock to watch their reaction. When we got our vegetable plate, we found that the dip wasn’t very good. I usually don’t like to eat vegetables…

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